


Mistakes We Share

by FoxyGirl96



Series: Takumi's Redemption [2]
Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Brotherly Bonding, Brotherly Love, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-11
Updated: 2019-09-11
Packaged: 2020-10-14 08:16:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20597597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FoxyGirl96/pseuds/FoxyGirl96
Summary: As the group are on the ship heading towards Nohr, Takumi is experiencing lingering feelings of guilt over attacking his allies. Taking notice of this, Corrin goes to talk to him and show him that they have more in common than he realises.





	Mistakes We Share

**Author's Note:**

> Set after Chapter 11 of Birthright.

It was a quiet night in the nation of Hoshido and somewhere out in the ocean, a large boat could be seen slowly drifting across the waves towards its destination. The sea was calm and it was clear in the skies as the stars were shining brightly like diamonds amongst the vast blackness of the sky. On the ship, the Hoshidan army had turned in for the night after the attack they had just experienced, and they were taking some rest before they arrived at their destination. As the group were sound asleep in their respective rooms and sleeping arrangement, it seemed that all was peaceful on the night. However, the same feeling of peace didn't seem to be felt by one person in particular: Takumi. He was finding it hard to get to sleep and he was left lying on his back and he was staring up at the ceiling of the room he was sharing with his retainers, Hinata and Oboro, before a quiet sigh of dismay escaped his lips. As he closed his eyes, all he could see were flashes of what happened in Mokushu; him attacking his own allies without him realising it, and the feeling of having no control over himself during those events. He could still hear the venomous words he spoke during that time echo in his mind, in a dark voice very unlike his own.

"Kill…"

"I will not stand in the shadows any longer… They will all see me for the first time!"

"I will make them pay for what they've done…"

"DIE!"

The memory of that last word leaving his mouth caused Takumi's eyes to shoot open, and he quickly sat up in the bed he had chosen to stay in for the night. An expression of mixed shock and despair crossed his face; he still couldn't believe that he had said those words, or that the actions he had taken during that day were his. Visions of that day spiralled through his mind and caused his heart to feel like it was being torn open by a sharp sword, causing feelings of guilt, despair and sorrow to start swarming through his system. "How could any of that have been me? Why would I even do things like that…?" Takumi quietly asked to himself; he was still finding it hard to understand that everything that happened was his own doing. It was as if some kind of dark force had taken control of him, forcing him to attack, and potentially kill, the allies he loved and held dear to him the most, and he had no way to fight back. He was simply being held captive within his own mind, forced to watch himself commit actions that he hated himself for, actions that he felt ashamed of himself for taking and actions he had to live with himself for…

Takumi rapidly shook his head in an effort to stop all of those negative thoughts spinning around in his mind, before he stood up from his bed and placed his feet on the floor, lowering his glance to think about what to do. "Maybe some time outside might help clear my head…" Takumi murmured to himself. He turned his glance to notice that Hinata and Oboro were sound asleep in their bunks, and once he was certain that they wouldn't hear him leaving, he slowly walked over to the door before opening it, stepping out of the room and closing the door behind him, making sure to be as quiet as possible as to avoid disturbing his retainers' peaceful slumber.

Once he made it outside of his room, Takumi slowly walked through the hallway that the rooms were located as he was trying to find the staircase that would lead up to the top deck. Thankfully, after only a few seconds of walking, he managed to find the staircase and slowly made his way up to find himself on the top deck. Takumi felt an expression of awe show on his face as he took notice of just how large the top deck was; now that things had settled down after the attack, it seemed that they could finally take some time to relax. "I didn't really notice just how large this place is…" Takumi commented, feeling a small smile show on his face. However, that smile quickly faded as he remembered why he came up here: he needed to have some alone time to think about what he had done. Almost as if it were an immediate response to this realization, Takumi could suddenly feel the memories start to return again. As he let out another quiet sigh, he slowly walked across the deck until he arrived at the pier railing and placed his arms against it, turning his attention towards the vast ocean surrounding him. He then felt an expression of dismay slowly cross his face as he lowered his head.

"Why can I not stop thinking about what I did that day? Why am I always being reminded of the mistakes I made? I'm doing everything I can to redeem myself, but even with that… these thoughts and memories of that day just won't leave me alone! Why? Why do my mistakes have to haunt me this way?!" Takumi cried, feeling his voice start to break while he was talking; it was clear to see that feeling the weight of his mistakes weighing down on him was becoming too much for Takumi to bear, and he didn't know what he could do to stop it. As he gripped on the railing tightly with both hands, he raised his head to look up towards the night sky, with mixed feelings of anger and despair shooting through him. "Why are you doing this to me, Gods? Can't you see how much I'm suffering through all of this? It's bad enough that I can't stop thinking about the things I've done, but now… those memories still remain even in my dreams! Why do you insist on torturing me like this?! WHY?!" Takumi yelled, his feelings of despair only increasing the strength of his voice as he was letting out everything he was feeling; he felt as though he had no control over the thoughts spiralling through his head, just like how he had no control over himself that day. As he was trying to catch his breath from his emotion-filled outburst, he felt his expression of anger fade away and become replaced with guilt and regret, perfectly reflective of the feelings he was experiencing. After a few seconds passed, he placed his arms against the railing and buried his head in his arms, as he started to let out quiet sobs; he didn't know how he would be able to manage being haunted by his mistakes like this, or what he could do to stop it. It was safe to say that the weight of his emotions was crashing down on him hard, and weighing very heavily on his heart.

Meanwhile on another area of the top deck, not too far from where Takumi was standing, Corrin was by himself and looking out at the view of the ocean passing by him; he needed some time to himself, as he was thinking about where he and the others were on their way towards. Corrin let out a content sigh and felt a small smile cross his face as he was looking out at the view in front of him. "It really is peaceful out here tonight. After the chaos we had to deal with, I think this is exactly what we all need." Corrin commented. After a few moments passed, his smile slowly faded and he felt an expression of uncertainty show on his face as the reality of the situation he was in started to set in. "To think that we're heading towards Nohr so suddenly… and that means…" As Corrin's voice slowly trailed into silence, that was when he realised what heading towards Nohr meant: he would have to fight against his siblings.

He knew that making the decision to side with Hoshido wouldn't be an easy one, but he still felt like it was the right choice even with how hard it was. He also knew that it would probably come at a cost, but he didn't expect the cost to be this hefty; now he was running the risk of having against the siblings who had loved and raised him for most of his life. They weren't his real siblings, but they were still family to him. He could still remember their reactions when they saw him make his choice, the feelings of shock, sadness, despair over why this was happening, and the worst feeling of all: the feeling of betrayal, that their beloved brother was turning his back on them. Just the memory of that fateful day was enough to send feelings of regret shooting through Corrin, and for him, that was the worst part. For him, that was the worst price to pay for his choice, and he let out a sigh of dismay as he felt this starting to sink in.

"I didn't realise at first how much my choice would affect others around me, but now just thinking about it… I can't help but wonder if I truly made the right choice. Was siding with Hoshido worth it if it comes at the price of fighting against the siblings I've loved for so long?" Corrin wondered to himself. He then shook his head before turning his glance down to continue his train of thought. "I guess I'll have to accept responsibility for the choice I made. When the time comes, that I'll have to fight against them… I'll probably need all the strength I can get." Corrin added. As he turned his glance upwards to the night sky, that was when he heard a voice from nearby.

"Why do you insist on torturing me like this?! WHY?!"

Corrin showed an expression of surprise at the sound of that voice and turned his glance back and forth to try and find where it was coming from. "What was that? Who was that yelling just now?" he asked. As he continued to look around the deck for a few moments, that was when he spotted someone just nearby. Upon taking notice of the fact that there was someone else on the deck besides him, Corrin started to make his way over to where the person was standing. As he started to get close, he stopped in his tracks as soon as he could recognise who the person was. "Huh? Is that… Takumi?" Corrin asked, his surprise quickly giving way to shock. Sure enough, he could recognise the archer standing in front of the pier railing with his head buried in his arms, and as Corrin had a close listen, he could hear the sound of quiet sobs. "What could Takumi be doing here? And why is he so upset? I guess there's only one way to find out." Corrin stated to himself. So with a nod of confirmation, he walked over to the pier railing before standing alongside Takumi.

With Takumi, he didn't even notice that there was someone else with him as he continued to sob quietly; he just wanted to let all of his feelings out. His feelings of guilt over what he had done, of despair that his mistakes were still haunting him and the feelings of helplessness over not being able to stop the memories from coming back to remind him of his failure. However, his breakdown was interrupted when he suddenly heard a voice from beside him. "Takumi?" At the sound of that voice, Takumi lifted his head in surprise before turning his glance to see Corrin standing beside him, and he had an expression of concern on his face.

"Corrin? Wh-what are you doing up here?" Takumi quietly asked. Corrin was silent for a few moments before turning his glance to Takumi. "I just came out here for some time to myself. And I was about to ask you the same question." Corrin replied. Takumi didn't give any response upon hearing this and he simply turned his glance away from Corrin and back to the view of the ocean in front of him; he didn't feel very certain about sharing the situation he was experiencing with Corrin. It wasn't that he didn't trust Corrin, since he had been doing his best to give Corrin a chance to prove himself ever since he sided with Hoshido, but rather that he didn't feel certain about how Corrin would respond to hearing about his troubles. However, it seemed that he didn't need to say anything because Corrin was the one to break the silence between them.

"You're thinking about what happened in Mokushu, aren't you?" Corrin asked. Takumi nearly jumped in shock upon hearing this question, since it meant that Corrin had figured out what was bothering him almost immediately, and that meant he was going to have to hear the truth sooner or later. So he figured that it would be best to just be honest with Corrin since he now had him cornered.

"Y-yes. How did you know?" Takumi quietly asked. Corrin showed a smile of amusement before giving his answer. "Well, I'm no Orochi, but I could figure it out right away. Aside from that, I could hear your outburst from where I was." Corrin replied, with his smile fading during this last statement. Takumi simply rolled his eyes with a sigh of annoyance during that first statement, and then he slowly turned his glance down with an expression of uncertainty showing on his face. Corrin could only stare in concern, seeing how just how affected Takumi was feeling after what happened that day, and he couldn't seem to figure out why. "Takumi, I know that what happened back then is something you feel ashamed of yourself for. I'm sure all of us remember that day, but we know that it wasn't your fault. We know you weren't in your right mind then." Corrin gently explained. Takumi slowly turned his glance up to Corrin before shaking his head in response.

"That's the least of my worries, though. I can't stop thinking about what happened that day, and what I did when I didn't have control of myself. No matter how hard I try, I keep seeing everything before my eyes: I always see you and everyone else in front of me, but I don't see you the way I usually do. I see myself attacking you and the others, with intent of harming and even possibly killing them! And the worst part is that I have no control over my actions, and I have no way to fight back against whatever it was that was controlling me, and I'm always reminded of my mistakes! They always haunt me, no matter how hard I try not to think about them. Why? Why am I being forced to remember everything I did during that time?!" Takumi cried, with an expression of despair showing on his face as he was trying to understand just what was going on with him. Corrin could only stare in shock upon hearing all of this, as he was realising just how hard Takumi's actions on that day were hitting on him. He could only remain silent for a few moments before he spoke.

"I have a feeling that it's because you truly feel like you failed that day, and that you can never be forgiven for what you've done. But there's nothing to worry about; you still have a chance to redeem yourself for what you did." Corrin gently explained. However, it seemed that Takumi wouldn't be swayed that easily as he shook his head rapidly in response, much to Corrin's surprise.

"I wish that was true, I really do. But no matter how hard I try to make up for the things I've done, all the memories keep coming back and I'm forced to be reminded of the mistakes I made and the fact that I tried to attack the allies I love and hold dear to me. It almost feels as though I'll never be allowed a chance to redeem myself, no matter how much I want it! Why would anyone want anything to do with me after what I've done? How can I ever show my face in Hoshido again?!" Takumi retorted, with an expression of despair showing on his face as he was starting to feel the memories returning to his mind once again, and the feelings of despair and guilt building up inside him only seemed to increase in intensity inside him. Corrin simply remained silent as he listened to this, as it was becoming clear to him just how much the events of that day had hit hard on Takumi, and how much he felt as though he would never be allowed to move on from what he had done. But he knew that he couldn't give up; he had to help Takumi see otherwise. So with this, he turned his glance up to Takumi with a gentle smile showing on his face.

"Takumi… if we really wanted nothing to do with you after what you did, why would we still have so much faith in you? Why would we believe that you'll be able to redeem yourself?" Corrin softly asked. Takumi was silent for a few moments before he realised that he couldn't give a response; he could tell that Corrin was right. Seeing that Takumi was saying nothing, which meant that he was listening to what he had to say, Corrin continued. "After you snapped out of your daze thanks to Azura, you stepped in to help us take down Kotato and his army. And then when we were attacked by those invisible soldiers, you, Setsuna, Sakura and Reina all worked together to defeat them. Granted, we all pitched in where we could, but I think it's safe to say that you four were the real victors then." Corrin said, with a smile of amusement showing on his face as he remembered how the four of them seemed to have everything under control during that battle, while everyone else was left in the sidelines. Takumi then turned his glance up to Corrin with an expression of surprise as he was listening to this.

"What… what are you trying to say?" Takumi asked, as he was wondering where Corrin was heading with this. Corrin let out a chuckle to himself, realising that he wasn't getting anywhere with what he was trying to say, before he figured that it would be best just to get to the main point.

"What I'm trying to say is that… we're all here for you, Takumi. We'll all be here to support you in any way you can, and even if you might not believe it, we know that you'll be able to redeem yourself and that these memories of what happened will leave you alone, hopefully sooner rather than later. And if I'm the one who's telling you this, you know I'm telling the truth. And that's because… I've been in a similar situation myself. As I'm sure you already figured out, I used to be a soldier fighting for Nohr. But ever since I arrived, everyone has accepted me and welcomed me into Hoshido. They forgave me for the things I've done against them and allowed me to fight alongside them. If they were able to find it in themselves to forgive and accept me, a former prince of Nohr, then I don't see any reason why they wouldn't do the same for you." Corrin explained, a gentle smile on his face all the while to show his sincerity in what he was saying; he dreaded having to bring up his history in fighting for Nohr, but he knew that it would be necessary in giving Takumi an idea in the fact that he would be able to have a chance to make up for everything he had done.

Takumi could only stare in shock, as he seemed to realise just how similar his and Corrin's situations were. That was something he never stopped to think about until it was pointed out to him, and now he seemed to realise just how true this was. That shock suddenly seemed to give way to amazement of just how certain Corrin was in everything he had been saying, and his feelings of despair seemed to fade away as he was starting that Corrin was right: he really did have a chance to redeem himself, no matter how much he tried to tell himself otherwise, and that even with what he had done, the others would still be there to support him and be there for him through everything that came their way. Just those thoughts were enough to make Takumi nearly completely forget about everything he had experienced over the course of this night and only think about what Corrin had said to him; his words seemed to ring strong in his mind, breaking through the negative thoughts that had haunted him until now. "You… truly think so?" Takumi softly asked.

Corrin showed a sincere smile before he nodded in confirmation. "Yes, I do. I know that you'll be able to do it." Corrin replied. That simple response was enough to make Takumi feel as though his heart was soaring, and that all of his despair and guilt had completely faded away and were being replaced by confidence, certainty in what he had to do… and hope that he really did have a chance. After a few moments passed, Takumi nodded in understanding.

"Well… all right, then. I'll do my best. I imagine it will take a while for me to fully forgive myself for what I did, but as long as everyone else has faith in me, then that gives me plenty of reason for me to try and redeem myself. I'll do whatever I can to atone for my mistakes, and restore my honour as a Prince of Hoshido." Takumi stated, with a small smile of confidence showing on his face as he was talking; it was safe to say that hearing everything Corrin had to say to him had had a positive effect on him, and to him, that was a good thing. Corrin showed a bright smile upon hearing this and nodded.

"That's great to hear. I don't think any of us could ask for anything else from you." Corrin commented. Just then, he let out a yawn much to Takumi's surprise before turning his head back to him. "I think I'm going to go back to my room now. We'll probably have a long way ahead of us before we have to get off. Are you coming too?" Corrin asked. Takumi showed a smile of amusement at this before he nodded in agreement.

"I'll be right with you." Takumi replied. Corrin nodded in understanding, so with this, he turned and started to make his way towards the staircase so he could head back to his room. As Takumi watched Corrin walk away, he turned his glance down as he started to wonder whether or not he should say this, before he decided that he shouldn't let this chance go to waste. So with that in mind, he turned his glance back up to Corrin. "Corrin?" Takumi asked. Corrin stopped in his tracks and turned to face Takumi, wondering what was up. Takumi was silent for a few moments before he showed a grateful smile. "Thank you. I think I really needed to hear something like that, and I'm glad that you were the one to tell me it. So… thank you so much, Brother." Takumi gently stated.

Corrin nearly froze upon hearing this: this was the first time he had heard Takumi call him 'Brother' sincerely. While he knew that Takumi hadn't completely accepted him as part of the family yet, this one statement was more than enough to show him how much Takumi truly wanted to accept him even with his initial hostility towards Corrin, and hearing him say that was a sure sign of his progress. Since he had no words at the moment, Corrin simply showed a smile in response before he started to make his way down the staircase while Takumi watched him on. Once he saw Corrin head down the staircase to make his way back to his room, Takumi turned around and walked back to the pier railing, before turning his glance up to the night sky with a grateful smile showing on his face.

"I was wrong… I was so wrong to say the things I did. I know that what I'm experiencing isn't easy, but that didn't give my any reason to let it out the way I did, especially towards you. But… I'm so glad that you're always looking out for me and the others, no matter what comes our way. Thank you…" Takumi softly said. With all this said, he turned around and started to head towards the staircase to get back to his room; he was eagerly awaiting the new days to come, because he knew he wouldn't have to face them alone. He had the support of his allies and loved ones, and there was no way he could ask for anything else.


End file.
